technology

The Ransomizer

How many nights have you sat in bed, sleepless, plagued by wonderings of why no one has ever built a CSS-based ransom note generator? One? A hundred? Countless?

I fall into the "countless" category.  So, gosh darn it, I decided to do something about it.  

Here it is. The Ransomizer. With which you can create ransom notes that might look like this:

The chicken we stole from your yard was mighty tasty.

Or maybe like this:

You should turn off your webcam more often.

Possibilities: endless!

Cory Doctorow takes apart the iPad

Cory Doctorow's broadside against the iPad, especially compared to to Xeni Jardin's infantile fawning, is probably the most cogent criticism you'll find right now.  Worthwhile just for the William Gibson quote.

Anyway, here's Hitler's response to the iPad.  It pretty much sums up everything you need to know if you're interested in a tablet PC.

The Future, by Professor A.M. Low

The Future

I found this delightful book in my in-laws' basement a few years ago: The Future, by A.M. Low.  Published in 1925 with nine glorious illustrations, which I've scanned for your pleasure.

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Linked In... To What?

This pretty much sums up my feelings about LinkedIn.  I get about, oh I don't know, 100% more work-related communications through Facebook than LinkedIn.

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Facebook sucks!

Why does Facebook insist on sucking? Where's all the stuff that used to be in the right sidebar? You know, the stuff that algorithmically made a certain amount of sense? Why can't I see my sister-in-law's posts unless I view every worthless stinking "so-and-so is now friends with so-and-so" item? Why can't I customize what posts I see in the default "news feed"? Why does Facebook SUCK SO HARD?

Good god. Might as well use Myspace. At least then I could have my favorite Creed song playing on my profile page.

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Spidey crafts

If you are planning for Armageddon, have a lot of time on your hands, don't mind being bitten by gigantic spiders and have a desire to weave yourself the strongest clothes ever,.....then this is the story for you.

Researchers and a team of 70 people spent four years harvesting spider silk from these gigantic spiders in Madagascar in order to weave one big (11' by 4") golden cloth.  So, now they have the only  large piece of cloth made from natural spider silk in the world.  Which is sort of cool in a geeky scientific way. But four years gathering spider silk....

Handlers had to extract the silk by hooking the spiders to a silking machine.  That's right.  They built a special contraption from designs from the late 1800s when some French dude had this clever idea to weave spider silk.  You are wondering how such critical technology could be allowed to fall from every day use, aren't you?   Well, the  experience of this intrepid band of researchers is telling. Researchers experienced trouble recruiting spider handlers who were OK with being bitten by these beauties. The biting part may be the  downfall of spider farming becoming a hot fad or growth industry.
spiders
That and having to wait four years for your next piece of spidey wear.

When did treehugger.com become so hideous?

Good god.  Look at this.  trehugger.com has become a jumble of crap.  It hurts my brain to try to sort out what it is I'm supposed to be looking at.  Was it always this way?  Seems like I remember it being a good-looking site.

treehugger.com

All the Web 2.0 whitespace has been replaced by ads and social networking claptrap.

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The Myth of the Interchangeable Programmer: Can’t We Just Offshore Him?

Neat to see these sotfware-production formulas spelled out so succinctly:

Over my years of watching software projects, I have identified two mathematical formulas that guide much of the industry. These formulas are:

Software Produced = Number of Workers x Hours Worked.

And:

Cost of Software = Number of Workers x Hours Worked x Hourly Cost Per Worker.

I call these the “Software Management Formulas” or SMFs. Understanding these formulas makes much of the absurdity in the industry understandable.

I've worked at more than one company where this is how things got done.  Or "got done," I should say.  It wasn't until I started working with a small group of programmers, all working remotely, that I understood what was wrong at these companies.*  Often the result of the "throw a body at it" approach is that your star programmers will end up going through the code and rewriting large portions of it anyway.  Why not just start off with a small group of good programmers in the first place?

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I love my Backnobber

The Backnobber is a simple tool that allows you to massage the knots out of the unreachable parts of your back without the aid of a) your significant other, b) a masseur, c) a chiropractor or d) electricity. It fits in your luggage. You can hang it on the wall. It could also probably be used as a martial arts weapon.

I love my Backnobber and I believe that the world would be a better place if everyone who suffered from back tension had one. There should be a government program to supply these to to everyone for free.

Whoever invented this thing is a genius and deserves to be richer than Bill Gates. I'm serious.

Buy one here.

Note: I am not in any way affiliated with the people who make the Backnobber. I just feel strongly that many people would benefit from having one.

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