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Which character from hit 2016 film Jason Bourne are you?

Which character from hit 2016 film Jason Bourne are you?

Which character from director Paul Greengrass's 2016 espionage action film best matches your unique personality?

High Roller
40% (2 votes)
Bus Passenger
20% (1 vote)
Office Worker
20% (1 vote)
Cyber Technician
20% (1 vote)
Government Lawyer
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 5

What will you do now that the 2016 political conventions are over?

What will you do now that the 2016 conventions are over?

The thrilling political conventions of 2016 have ended, leaving you feeling empty and adrift. What will you do with your life now?

Listen to Phil Collins's hit 1985 album, No Jacket Required
50% (1 vote)
Finally tell neighbor how much you admire his topiary skills
50% (1 vote)
Open a Benihana franchise
0% (0 votes)
Eat a huge bowl of chili
0% (0 votes)
Sit back, relax, enjoy a few months of politics-free Internet
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 2

How will you try to impress people in the interview?

How will you try to impress people in the interview?

You have an interview for a job today. What will you do to impress your potential employers?

Pretend you know how to do things
40% (2 votes)
Talk a lot about fresh fruit
20% (1 vote)
Tell them about the time you saw Dick Knipfing at the Costco
20% (1 vote)
Casually apply lip balm
20% (1 vote)
Innocently forget to mention the stretch you did upstate
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 5

How will you bumble the first 1000 uses of your "chip technology" credit card?

How will you bumble your first 50 uses of your new "chip technology" credit card?

Cashiers are crossing their arms and waiting for you to pay with your chip card. How will you bumble each interaction?

I swiped, but it's telling me to insert the card
33% (4 votes)
I have to insert it?
17% (2 votes)
I think I took it out too soon
17% (2 votes)
It keeps telling me to leave it in
8% (1 vote)
I have no idea how this works
8% (1 vote)
Can I take it out now?
8% (1 vote)
Did it work?
8% (1 vote)
Where do I put it?
0% (0 votes)
I don't need to sign?
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 12

What will you do when you see this terrifying creature?

What will you do when you see this terrifying creature?

You are swimming in the freezing waters of Antarctica when you come face-to-face with this terrifying creature. What will you do?

Yell for wife to look at who I'm talking to
50% (2 votes)
Offer it a bit of sandwich
25% (1 vote)
Wipe goggles for the millionth time except they're fogged from the goddamn inside goddammit
25% (1 vote)
Update Instagram feed with photo of terrifying creature
0% (0 votes)
Swim away as quickly as possible
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 4

What did you think would happen when you clicked on that?

What did you think would happen when you clicked on that?

You clicked on a thing, now you're sad. What did you think would happen?

See some goddamn bloopers for chrissake
80% (4 votes)
Find out why doctors hate that guy so much
20% (1 vote)
Lose belly fat
0% (0 votes)
Learn one weird trick
0% (0 votes)
Regain dignity
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 5

How will you explain Debbie Wasserman Schultz to your children?

How will you explain Debbie Wasserman Schultz to your children?

Your children are asking questions about Congresswoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz. What will you tell them?

Florida
56% (5 votes)
Is Odd Squad on?
22% (2 votes)
Just let Mommy drink, OK Honey?
11% (1 vote)
I'll explain it to you when you're 40
11% (1 vote)
Ask your mother
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 9

What will you do with your collection of Guy Fieri clippings?

What will you do with your collection of Guy Fieri clippings?

You've been clipping photos of Guy Fieri from magazines for years. What do you plan to do with them?

Throw them into the fires of Mount Doom
50% (4 votes)
Form them into a Guy-golem
25% (2 votes)
Leaf through them ruefully
13% (1 vote)
Grind them into a rub
13% (1 vote)
Wallpaper over Jacques Pepin shrine
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 8

Why aren't you going to the important tech conference?

Why aren't you going to the important tech conference?

You are skipping this year's important tech conference. Why?

Lanyard allergy
67% (2 votes)
Have actual work to do
33% (1 vote)
Can't grow beard in time
0% (0 votes)
Still hung over from last important tech conference
0% (0 votes)
Forgot
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 3

What are all these Texans doing here?

What are all these Texans doing here?

You've noticed a lot of Texas license plates in your neighborhood lately. What are all these Texans doing here?

Wouldn't y'all like to know
60% (3 votes)
Visiting your dumb ass
40% (2 votes)
Gathering ideas for new country song "When You Ain't In Texas You Sure Ain't In Texas"
0% (0 votes)
Redistricting practice
0% (0 votes)
Hoping to get back to Texas in time for Texas Day
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 5

What did you like best about House of Eternal Return?

House of Eternal Return

You finally went to Meow Wolf's House of Eternal Return. What was your favorite part?

Chamber of Strangers' Breath
100% (1 vote)
Bean dip grotto
0% (0 votes)
Room of a thousand grandmas
0% (0 votes)
Secret front door that only I saw
0% (0 votes)
Gift shop
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 1

Why do you hate Buffalo Wild Wings so much?

Buffalo Wild Wings

You made disparaging remarks about Buffalo Wild Wings today in the car. Why?

Too many memories
40% (2 votes)
No buffalo meat on the menu
20% (1 vote)
Would it kill them to serve breakfast wings?
20% (1 vote)
They'll never measure up to Fuddruckers
20% (1 vote)
Refused to turn the TV off for book group
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 5

What are your weekend plans?

What are your weekend plans?

It's the end of a long week. How will you be spending your two days off?

Regretting previous week's choices
50% (2 votes)
Cleaning up after someone who I won't name here
25% (1 vote)
Cheesecake binge
25% (1 vote)
Staying abreast of atrocities
0% (0 votes)
Floating in isolation tank
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 4

What do you want for your birthday?

It's your birthday today.

It's your birthday today. What are you hoping for?

Attention
67% (2 votes)
It's a little late to be asking me now
33% (1 vote)
Mint Condition 1995 Robocop The Series 15" Electronic Action Figure
0% (0 votes)
Licence to alcohol
0% (0 votes)
Cake with my name spelled correctly
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 3

Why didn't you make the coffee this morning?

Sad Coffee

You could have at least put the water on, but you didn't. Why?

Same reason I didn't feed the pets
50% (1 vote)
Pondering mysteries of space and time
50% (1 vote)
Was in the zone
0% (0 votes)
Busy wondering why Zack Snyder chose to feature Ben Affleck's rippling abs instead of Henry Cavill's
0% (0 votes)
Conversation starter
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 2

Why didn't you exercise this morning?

Morning exercise

You overslept instead of exercising this morning. Why?

House arrest
50% (1 vote)
Exercise and I are on a break
50% (1 vote)
Ominous clouds
0% (0 votes)
Having pleasant dream about physical fitness
0% (0 votes)
Ice cream hangover
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 2

Poll: Which character from Ghostbusters are you?

Ghostbusters

Which of these characters from the hit 2016 film Ghostbusters most accurately describes you?

Hotel Doorman
33% (1 vote)
Scared Tourist
33% (1 vote)
Audience Member
33% (1 vote)
Pedestrian
0% (0 votes)
Ozzy Osbourne Merch Guy
0% (0 votes)
Scared New Yorker
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 3

Poll: Why did you stay up so late watching a Star Trek movie?

Star Trek: First Contact

You stayed up long past your bedtime watching Star Trek: First Contact. Why?

Fan of Jonathan Frakes oeuvre
100% (1 vote)
Personal reasons
0% (0 votes)
That scene where you can see Worf's penis
0% (0 votes)
Pleasant distraction from tribble problem
0% (0 votes)
Can't remember
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 1

Poll: Why haven't you taken the poll?

Perd Hapley

You and the poll both exist, but you haven't taken the poll. Why?

Didn't know about poll
67% (2 votes)
Don't like clicking on stuff
33% (1 vote)
Don't take polls
0% (0 votes)
Busy doing online quiz
0% (0 votes)
Left phone in toilet
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 3

Poll: Why aren't you using your turn signal?

Image credit: wikihow.com

You don't use your turn signal when your turn or change lanes. Why?

Where and when I turn is my business
30% (3 votes)
Taking freeway selfie
20% (2 votes)
Reasons
20% (2 votes)
What is a "turn signal"?
20% (2 votes)
My religion forbids it
10% (1 vote)
Same reason I throw garbage out my window
0% (0 votes)
Total votes: 10

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