July 2004
Brazen daytime prostitutes
July 30, 2004 - 2:56pm | Melvix
Erika: Good evening. It's for sale, right now!
Dick: But it's not only being sold after dark!
KRQE's ongoing efforts to inform its elderly viewers in Rio Rancho about the seedy, vice-ridden slums of Booooorque continue with this insightful story about the particulars of daytime prostitution. A subject with which Dick and Erika, as "journalists," have more than just a passing familiarity.
Did the insurance company help Jessie and her family? No.
July 30, 2004 - 12:22pm | MelvixRon Bell's Web site features a selection of his TV spots. I think my favorite is "Biker," just for the crude double-entendre.
Mango rhymes with tango
July 30, 2004 - 9:22am | MelvixThe recently-opened Gorilla Tango Comedy Theatre has a theme song! It's available to us here in MP3 format, for our listening pleasure.
Gorilla Tango... Gorilla Tango... Gorilla Tango... It gets funnier every time I say it. A gorilla? Dancing the TANGO? The krazy komedic possibilities are endless!
More funny things:
- A chimp dressed like a surgeon
- A talking banana
- A dancing banana
- A donkey wearing a thong
- A shark dressed like an elf
- Anything with a banana or a chimp or a shark
But seriously folks. I have nothing but respect for anyone who gets on stage in an attempt to make other people laugh. Especially if they tell Ron Bell jokes. Example:
Jimbo: [Bleeding] Ouch! I just got ran over by a car!
Bubba: Better call Ron Bell!
I haven't seen any Gorilla Tango shows yet, but I hope they do lots of Ron Bell jokes, like this one:
Hootie: [Hunched over in pain] My back hurts from the injury I received!
Toots: Have you called Ron Bell yet?
Huge laughs, guaranteed, every time!
Earning you’re trust, one exploding deputies home at a time
July 27, 2004 - 3:33pm | MelvixIt hasn't earned my trust, but KRQE has earned my undying gratitude for providing so much content for this blog.
I know it's nitpicky, but... doesn't anyone at the station know the difference between "deputies" and "deputy's"?
Too bad we’re not letting COPS film here anymore
July 27, 2004 - 2:49pm | MelvixRepublican lawmaker Rory Ogle was arrested earlier this month and charged with "aggravated battery on a household member."
The argument escalated and Rory Ogle picked up a twin bed headboard and threw it at his wife, hitting and possibly breaking her right hand, Anita Ogle said; he also threw a mop at her, which hit her but did not cause an injury, she said.The police officers interviewing the woman then went to the Ogle home to detain her husband, the complaint said. Ogle came to the front door after officers made numerous attempts to contact him, and he was arrested.
The officers noticed Ogle appeared to be extremely intoxicated, noting his speech was slurred, his eyes were watery and bloodshot, and he smelled like alcohol, the complaint said.
Maybe they were fighting about the kids. The story at the Trib doesn't say whether he was shirtless or not at the time of his arrest.
West Side values
July 27, 2004 - 5:57am | MelvixThis story at the Tribune about the Montaño bridge is worth reading.
On the other side of the river, land values have soared far beyond expectations, some say.In 1995, a real estate broker predicted West Side values would increase by 10 percent to 25 percent.
Try 50 percent, broker Phil Ward now says.
...
Has the bridge improved their life?
"Actually, yes and no," Pat Murken said. "We needed the bridge just to get into Albuquerque; traffic was getting backed up pretty bad. But there are more people on the West Side now. We're still getting bombarded with new houses out here. Still, it's a lot better than it was."
Do not fuck with T.H. Lang
July 23, 2004 - 5:48am | MelvixGreg Payne devoted space in his column in the Alibi this week to the idea that the Journal's relentless coverage and recoverage of the story about Doug Copp (another excellent photo from the Journal here) was motivated by revenge.
Clearly, Copp appears to be a charlatan. But it's also clear from the Journal's reportorial overkill that you don't dupe Tom Lang without being taught a lesson by the newspaper he owns.
Also: Tom Lang hates Spider-Man.
Results of Dick Knipfing highness poll
July 21, 2004 - 3:17pm | MelvixNow that all twenty of you have cast your votes, it's time to take a look at the "How high is Dick Knipfing" poll results.
| How high is Dick Knipfing? | ||||||||||||||||||||
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I was certain that the "Bob from accounting" choice would be the clear winner, but what do I know? Just as many people think Dick Knipfing flies high with The Lord. And just as many people think Dick Knipfing succumbs to some kind of weird Tom Joles-envy after a few hits off the old peace pipe. But the important thing to keep in mind is that 100% of people polled believe that Dick Knipfing is high.
